This is gonna be a post and a half...it's for me as there is a ton of stuff that I wanna record...and maybe, just maybe, someone behind me on the path (hard as that is to believe today) they might learn from my mistakes if they care to read.
This is from Yday: Home journal
I am deeply troubled by my trading todaynot due to drawdown but by the fact that i acted unconsciously and without any real effort to assess and change my mind/thinking/bias. And I have all the tools and knowledge to do that.
Errors:
1) Thinking what do I think the market will do?and acting on that.
2) Not asking who is making money before entering a trade? (new rule??? no trading until I see one side makes money???) hmmm.)
3) Not assessing HHs and HLs etc
4) Not using Mirror chart
Positives:
didnt lose it
managed BE on bad trade
played wrong side fairly well..until I didnt
stuck to max loss
Error 1)
The real starting point for me is the question what leads me to act unconsciously? I got long 1 on Bar 1 close area (so planning to add) with the thought that Bullish strength will continue at some levelnot an unreasonable thoughtbut still just an opinion!!!!! It is NOT a trade signal. I have said that I need to wait for a signal but then I dontthats the crux. I act on a whim after planning to wait for a signal.
Error 2)
Who made money? On the Open Pa Dax always asks who is making money and watches for that. It makes perfect sense to me. The bears made 1R almost imm selling Bar 1 close. That should put me at least on short watch, even with a bullish bias. Bears are making moneythats what matters. The Bulls had to scrounge and scalp all day long.
Error 3)
We made LHs all day long except at 11 am for a minutethen continuation down. At some point that should over rule any bias.
Error 4)
Tim checks in on that mirror chart on Bear trend days (to get a different view) and when I look at it there are places I would die to get longneed to use it. I didnt because I was lazy about assessing the action and questioning my plan.
Mirror chart:
The main issue that I believe will affect all the others is truly a fear of success thing. I dont now how else to explain this behaviour. Its been going on long enough and against enough new tools that should produce good results that I think I am going to do some research and reading and maybe even talk to a psychologist about fear of success issues.
I am very disciplined in most areas of life but I read a few articles today and one caught my attention by saying you cant discipline yourself out of unconscious behaviours.
And then there was today...FUCK. This is the chart so far.
Got long Yday POC...not a "signal" but a decent trade with odds of a bounce in my faovur. No edge other than that so 2 pt stop only and it got hit. NO problem.
Held that area and Bar 8 ripped higher and thru the Open...got long before bar close and out for 5 point stop on full collapse. There was no 'legit' signal and no trade should have been taken.
Bar 8 closed really bearish (having just stopped me out) so I sold there thinking we would see a MM down maybe....Jumped out 7 points higher as the deal was clear. Bar 8 was bearish AF but was not a trade signal in itself...no trade should have been taken.
Bar 9 that killed my short was a signal in itself...a statement/surprise bar. I treid to get long the BO area but it took off with no fill. A MM and 60 min target was Imminent so got long higher and grabbed a few pennies.
Got long @ 87...buying the BO before the BO signal...no trade should have been taken. Stopped.
Got long the EMA without even a whiff of selling hesitation...You guessed it...no real signal... no trade shoudl have been taken.
In way past Max loss limit I got long 3@ 83 Looking for new HOD as per Bar 18 trade...HOD or LOD is in...I assessed new HOD was way more likely. grabbed 7 and 4 back. Actual trade signal...good trade.