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Wow.... Well you have been a valuable contributor and poster on this forum, so maybe since you were so close with just 1 vote needed, @Big Mike would consider just one more combine winner.. ANd maybe even a smaller combine.. Your journals have been great and brutally honest.
Thanks, and that is up to @Big Mike to decide but I wanted to observe and describe some feelings.
However, I have taken it within my stride like a trade which almost reaches your target, comes short by one tick and reverses, only to hit your full stop later on. Handling the feeling of "not winning" is at the very crux of being a successful trader - the very core of the holy grail, wherein no loss or no lost opportunity causes feelings strong enough to destabilize the correct mindset needed for consistent trading.
I would like to record the following cascade of feelings I had about this journalling contest, because the feelings mirror the way I handle trading in a way:
- My posting reduced unlike when I was consistent before the contest (only to be resumed in full force in the last week - "There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you." - Maya Angelou) - there is still that "I do not want to win!" demon lurking in me due to reasons described in my frankly too honest post earlier.)
- Some folks disapproved of me requesting Thanks (only on the last day) in the chat box but I do not regret that decision. Reasonable and within limits advertising is allowable and I am happy that I did not send you "Please vote for me" PMs to anyone except to one guy ( @kronie who waxed eloquent about by journal in my journal but didn't put Thanks here (!!) - basically many users are busy and forget to do such things so I PMed him!) . I read reports of some users sending out mass private messages to Thank them which for me was crossing a certain line, IMHO.
- When @indextrader7 went into an emotional rollercoaster and did some things caused his own banning I was questioning my decision whether I did the right thing by committing to gift him the combine prize if I win. I still pray for him because he had described that at one point his savings were all of $23 before he was able to find a job and perhaps understand his rollercoaster if I put myself in his shoes - not that I condone the behavior, but prayer and faith are great sustaining powers. I still will; a promise is a promise.
- At that last mile or rather last day I had to face a test of my character, similar to what happens in a trade - I admit I was tempted to walk to some friend and ask them to register here and vote for me - a $400 combine was slipping away because some user had removed his Thanks at the last minute and @Big Mike was about to increase the prizes by and unknown number but 3 to 5 was a reasonable target ! The temptation was strong, but I knew that when one obtains things on fake credentials it is like building a castle in quicksand (Read Dan Arielly - "Why wearing fakes makes us cheat more"). I thought "If I cheat here I might as well photoshop out fake combine results and post them here. I might as well pretend to be a bigshot trader like so may do on ET.". Thankfully I passed the character test and did none of the above. I believe I've come out stronger, prize or no prize.
Trading: Dax, ES, FX, Gold and Oil but what Bund and Bobl also.
Posts: 106 since Jul 2012
Thanks Given: 108
Thanks Received: 126
Congratulations to everyone who won the contest. I sincerely hope that each and every single one of you is able to go through the process with TST and get fully backed. I'll be looking forward to hearing of your success (no pressure). Thanks to Big Mike for organising this and adding 2 more combines to the prize.
thanks mike for invite me to participate
congratulations to the winers and to all people journaling!
i am very surprised to finish on the top five between heavy weight traders , market wizards, and wellknown people all of you have help me a lot on my path to find my way of trading
i will use the prize to made my first combine and work as much as I can to try to trade it as a real $,
thanks for everybody!
La lucha es de igual a igual contra uno mismo
The fight is fair against oneself
I was able to split my combine and share half with Roy. Both @srgtroy and myself have rolled our contest combines. Looking to do the next combine early next month.
I want to thank Terry again for sharing his combine. He said he would and he did! A lot of people talk the talk, a lot fewer walk the walk, but he did. He was even going to gift me his whole $150,000 combine, but I suggested 15 contracts might be too much for me anyway and that it would be fun if we could do one together, so TST was nice enough to allow us to split it into two $50,000 combines. Anyways, thanks again, Terry, you are generous and a man of your word!
p.s. -- while I did not share the details of my combine, the highlight was probably the last day when I went for broke and then lost internet connectivity