Have you guys ever heard of, fear of success?
Isn't that one of the biggest enigmas and ironies that's out there?
It's like trading right! I mean how crazy is that?
I do want to make money, I love money, I love trading! But I'm still loosing money.
What we're experiencing here is a conflict between the conscious mind and the subconscious mind.
Remember, who the real you is! You're actually the sum of all your programming. Funny thing right? We got a lot of programmers in here!
So, being the sum of all your programs, and by the fact that your subconscious mind has the role of protecting you. There you got it!
It doesn't allow you to make money. Because somewhere in the programs you've got a bad experience that has a negative charge, and it keeps holding you back from getting hurt "again".
For instance let's say that you've been brought up by your parents (and they by their own parents), with a small simple value, such as "In order to earn money, you have to work hard".
It has probably been put there, somewhere between the age of 0-7. After that it has been amplified every time you've been in and out of social contexts containing those values.
Unfortunately, our parents becomes parents without getting any instruction manual on how to raise kids, plus that we have the social construction as well in the picture.
What does all this lead to?
Your parents are starting to train you in order to fit into the social construction. By doing that, they forget about unconditional love, and they start to introduce two things, punishment and reward.
They punish us when we're not following their instruction and reward us when we do as we're told. The kind of reward we get is, acceptance.
When we get that acceptance, we then fulfill one of our basic needs. Remember?; the need for security.
That creates here an association, with an equation that says "In order to earn money, you have to work hard" equals "SAFETY".
We grow up, and start to work, and eventually we find out that, working hard equals earning money. And the safety need is fulfilled.
No problems here right?
Everybody's happy
!
Til you get into situations that can make you money easy, without having to work hard. That's when you blow it!
Take trading for instance. You've gone all the way. You've gone through all the phases (learning, experience, indicators etc). You're a complete trader. But you're still loosing money! By now, trading is easy for you. Doing it is easy, acting upon it is easy.
Suddenly we've got a new equation into play. "Earning money is easy" equals "NOT TRUE". Why? We do not want the money!
Life is not about money. Life is about safety. We live in societies, that has told us that we can reach safety through money. Money is just a tool, nothing else.
We want safety, and if that isn't met by the information we got in our subconscious minds we do whatever there's in our power to go for that.
And if the real you is, the sum of all your programs, there's simply no place for that there!
Scary thing right! It scared the hell out of me, the first time I realized that's the way things are working. I refused to buy the concept. And it took me a while before, I finally had the courage to face it, and to understand that, it doesn't matter how I take it or perceive it, by my conscious mind. The subconscious plays the lead here.
And no matter how much I refused to accept that, it wasn't that way. That I do love money, and that money is easy to earn, and that I love being all that trading is giving me. It just laughed back at me by decreasing my account.
Do you now understand how fear of success works and why it works that way? This was of course a very basic example. Every case is unique with it's own ingredients, but manly is built on the columns explained above.
In the next article, I'll write about what to do about it. Hang in there guys, there's hope!
To be continued...