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I took it back down to 4 contracts. Caught today coming and going. Done.
What I see, having taken a long time to get to the point where I believe I am being aware of the right things, is that if I just stop thinking and react to what the chart says, I trade very well. When I start to predict, "know something", feel like I have any say whatsoever in what happens, that mental zone is lost. And increasing size causes me to do that. THINK.
I did not spend years of practicing to think. I spent years of practicing to be able to respond. Without thought, without emotion, non-attachment. The next move is decided by the chart, not by me.
"Ice in the veins" is not meant to be defiant, which is something that I have misinterpreted recently. It is the ability to run cool, to chill, to never overheat.
I am building a new trade box, and in terms of building a new computer, if you want a computer to run very fast, be capable of very powerful things, I have to design it with adequate cooling.
So my key issue, is cooling. I guess my current study is to push size until I become aware of starting to "lose my cool", and then to determine why. If that means I am just trying to run faster than is possible with my hardware, I need to slow things down. If it means the hardware is capable of a lot more, I need to look at improved cooling.
Ventilation.
Can you help answer these questions from other members on NexusFi?
It just occurred to me that yesterday's acupuncture meridian screening suggested that I was out of balance, "too cold", compared to the one before that.
And in between was my push into my major mind issue. I had gone into that "ice in the veins" zone not understanding the term last week as I do today.
Since you bring this up so many times I ve been burnt by trying to just make that extra $50 to round off to 4 figures so I can say that, only to watch 1/2 the profits disappear and then go back to my coccoon with my tail between my legs.
I had a very weird dream last night with a lot of trading references, but hidden in a story that was way off topic. Kind of.
As I woke up, I was just getting to the first surgical instruments. On the side of this combination of a civil war bone saw / bowie knife, brand-spanking new stainless, it was stamped "TIJUANA SURGICAL GRADE STAINLESS". That means, some of my current chart tools are iffy.
The ongoing theme of the dream, was that all trades have a destination. That does not mean that trade gets there, but that when it gets sidetracked, you get off and wait for the next ride.
Long story, but I'll give a shout out to my friend Pete for the invite to the big oil company private party. Nevermind that we lost all my hospital paperwork and he wound up puking face down in a puddle...
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
I had decided at the beginning of this year that I would "stretch" for the first 2 months. That is winding down, and getting old a little early, but it felt good. Surprisingly good, considering I had that one Friday of a revisit to something from my past, and that one day equaled 4 or 5 good days of wins. But what it allowed me to do was replay that event and come to a different understanding of it. And a re-assessment of what occurred that one day, not that far back in this journal, but very far back in time. An acceptance, a loss of fear, and a very calm place overall. The markets can hurt me, if I decide to stand there and dare it to hit me again. The previous time, having gotten so beat by the world in general, that I decided to stand up to it one day in some weird mix of childish bravado while oblivious to reality.
"Catching big waves" is misleading. To ride a big wave, you do not surf from top to bottom, you surf in the sweet spot, as it moves along, adjusting constantly as it will not slow down.
I always thought it was interesting when I remove price from the chart and just look at the profile.
true dat, was thinking the same thing.
I enjoy talking to you Gary even though I don't have much to say. Your wisdom seems to transcend the English language. Sometimes when I read what you say it's like putting together a puzzle that grows in meaning with every piece I put in place.
R.I.P. Joseph Bach (Itchymoku), 1987-2018.
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