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I'm not regular profitable person to guide/advice you but your post does bring up some scars in my heart to surface.
I want to keep the mood light but just out curiosity;
You said you tried 9 approaches? Did you mean strategies? If yes, no offense, but that's far too less over the number of years you have counted. (Please tell if I understood you wrong)
Other than that, I fully agree with what most ppl here have said.
Having passion about something and being good at it doesn't go hand in hand, turning approach to investing rather than day trading can also make a huge difference.
Those words are very valuable, also very repeated, its just to take them seriously one usually has to take a long walk in these turbulent waters first. Usually those words are lost in the noise.
Fyi, also, if it makes you feel any better, I've firm belief that most masquerading profitable traders on internet are just having their own little ego trips.
Not to say there are no profitable traders, its just important to remember how "rare" it is, its not a big enough loss when one establishes its not his/hers cup of tea and moves on to next cup.
I love this thread because it started with honesty and authenticity. My thanks to those who responded with their comments of experience, hope and best advice.
We are liable to get our hearts broken by trading the futures market. We are playing a very difficult game with our passion. This is an eternally fascinating game, one that is winnable with skill, self control and self awareness....and constant adjustment of strategy to respond to the changing market. It is so difficult because it is a zero sum game and we play against people who are as smart or smarter and more experienced than we are. A lot of them are using machines.
I naturally underestimated like most everyone else what it would take to be successful but over 5 years as I have sim traded, traded live, back tested, gone back to live, back tested more, had a mentor, studied Brooks, Raschke, Quant Trade, back to sim trading, back to live--- I have broken even moneywise, but I have gained so much else.
What I have profited from way beyond money is a highly exhilarating experience from 6:30-8:30 am PST every market day on ES and NQ. It is fun and it is instructive about my own ignorance and limitations as well as learning about my own inner strength and my skill.
I have learned to keep it fun, go ahead and indulge my passion but not give in to emotional overreaction to losses, but also not permit my account to be unduly impacted pursuing losing strategies caused either by my inconsistency or neurotic character flaws. After all if I lose everything, I can no longer enjoy my favorite game!
The trick is not to lose my ass while I am enjoying the experience! That should be the motto of a futures day trader. NEVER RISK LOSING YOUR ASS while you learn to play the game.