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[in] human relationships that it is virtually impossible for one individual to have a lasting positive influence upon members of a group of negative thinkers.
..it [also] works the other way. You cannot maintain a positive, productive attitude if you spend all your time with negative people. Those who have wrecked their own lives (and usually blame their misfortune on others) are not the kind of people who will help you achieve success in your own life.
Choose your friends and associates carefully, and refrain from complaints about your job, your company, or any individual. Spend your time with positive, ambitious people who have a plan for their lives. You will find that their optimism is infectious.
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Very well said aquarian - I recall Stephen Covey and his 7 Habits. Habit 1 is "Be proactive", which basically means you know you're in the driving seat in terms of deciding the course of your life.
Negative people for me are those who don't see that. They believe that they are unable to influence their life significantly and so they blame others for their poor results.
In Covey's "Maturity Continuum" they are stuck at the lowest level of maturity, which is Dependence: depending on others to get what they want; it's not the attitude of "me", it's the attitude of "you". You come through for me. Or you don't come through for me. Then I can blame you for the results. It's very "you"-oriented.
Positive thinkers, on the other hands, are those who believe they can influence their life and they focus their effort on that.
Another concept from Covey's book is the Circle of Influence and the Circle of Concern
Proactive/positive people focus on the inside circle, i.e. what they are able to influence. The theory being that the more you influence, the more you can influence, leading to the inner circle getting larger and larger.
Dependent people focus on the outside circle. Things they cannot (or do not want to) influence.
Covey's theory is that being able to implement the first 3 habits move people from the low-level maturity stage of Dependence to the intermediate level of Independence.
He calls this step "private victory", because being able to achieve these first 3 habits represent a personal achievement. In other words, the first 3 habits are centered around the "self".
Habit 4, 5 and 6 are all about relationships with others, so by implementing those, one achieves the "public victory", and moves to the high-maturity stage of Interdependence.
One cannot be Interdependent with others unless he/she and the others achieve Independence. In other words, it is a sequential and progressive journey.
Habit 7 is, basically speaking, a refresh and revisitation of the prior 6 habits.
Thank-you for the maturity post - great stuff!
I particularly want to thank-you for doing the work of getting the diagram and embedding it in your post.
Going the extra mile to do that work benefits us all and enriches the thread.