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Catching Big Waves - a trader's journal of surfing the the markets
Sunday 5
Wednesday 25
Thursday 35
Friday 45
Net 110
Win% 61.7
PF 1.59
Max win 41
max loss 34
47 RTs
It was a good week, in that I had no losing days, but the numbers were really weak. I could not seem to take a trade where something else in my schedule did not conflict with it, and had a lot of tiny trades, many were dropped 5 to 20 ticks short of my goal as I would get a call that I needed to meet someone, and "in a trade" is not a polite excuse to keep someone waiting. I often come back and see how much my meeting may have cost me. (possible, but never really known in hindsight).
My max loss was high for me also, I very rarely allow something to go that far against me. I do not remember that trade, so have no idea why, but apparently it seemed like a good idea at the time. I do recall a trade where I had decided on a direction, and it went against me so I dropped it, then entered again same direction a few minutes later, but I am not sure that was it. If it was, hopefully it was paired to the max win...
This was a tough week to try to trade at all. I had a project closing in Boston, one adding a bunch of things in Virginia, another closing in Florida, started this one myself in Colorado, and a warranty issue in swouthwest Florida. My phone would start some days at 6am eastern, of 4am where I am, and I had work going here until midnight one night. Also had some contract issues that added difficulty in Boston, worked with one of the least pleasant companies in my career. On top of that, I flew in Monday, stayed in one hotel, moved out and stayed in another on Tuesday, and then moved into a townhouse on Wednesday. And lastly, my phone died Tuesday and I had to get another, went to a different brand, and the learning curve was time consuming... So, I should give myself some slack on the trading side. If I were to follow my "plan", I would not have traded at all. Paraphrasing, "Must be well rested, focused", etc.
But, I made it, it is Friday, and I picked up enough trading to cover my travel budget overage in renting this townhouse for a month, buy an assortment of Colorado-brewed beers, and pay for a Disc Golf set (had no idea there were drivers, mid range and putters).
I am beginning to believe that odds do not matter as much as I once thought. It does not sound like good advice as I type it, but knowing that is not swaying my opinion right now.
The ability to believe in an outcome, wait for that outcome, and bail quickly when it is not happening, and not care either way, might just be a "trading plan". I did just laugh out loud at that, but there is some truth there.
Hi, Mike, I was faced by the same situation years before. First of all I thought at that time : ' My life is over ' - but then I saw a lot of possibilities to change my life to a new way, starting a new / a ' second ' life, just leaving the old behind + lookin' only for the possibilities for a p o s i t i v e f u t u r e l i f e. And I - without any exeption - think of ' What was positive in my passed live ? ' and I found : There was a lot positive, there are a lot of things having brought a lot of fun to my live.
T h e s e memories helped me ' to survive ' mentally and if something wrong happened to me today, I think back to these things and it immediately is better to me.
This is the way I do.
However :
I have to sent you a small part of the text of an answer given to aragon and his last statement today, I whrote :
The greatest and most qualified source to improve my skills was BigMikes page and all the statements of the different members, sometimes just tiny trifles read or found there made a big impact to me.
This is true as something can be true. And this is something I absolutely want to let you to know. What you have done for traders, your qualified statements, the organisation, all the webinars, to put traders together is more than can find anywhere, it helped me more than any other source / forum / circle or whatever you will call / name it.
And when I - over years - have g i v e n only a few statements : The only reason is : I have really worked hard,
until my eyes become red sometimes, to reach the target, to create a useful chart / trading system. I hope, to be
there, to get back a bit, to make the profits I expected, when starting this project.
A big, big Thank you for anything you have done for the community.
The thought of divorce can be one of the most traumatic events to your psychology. I did not go through with one, but my wife decided she wanted one back in 2001? I had come to indentify myself as a "husband", and would have never believed how many things are wrapped into that identity, that once removed left a shell of who I thought I was. In my case, we spent about 6 months apart, and I consider myself lucky. But, also lucky that we went through the experience. It caused us to understand ourselves better, communicate with each other better.
Years later my financial meltdown caused me to challenge who I was all over again. While it was nothing I would describe as pleasant, I am finding that events such as those can provide the fuel for a healthy renewal, possibily a well-needed hard look at our goals, our beliefs...
I agree with that completely. Compared to other trading sites, the big advantage in my opinion is that futures.io (formerly BMT) provides open two-way (or more) communication, in a format that allows us to assimilate and/or participate at our own pace.
While there are a lot of technical discussions on futures.io (formerly BMT), it is the human side that I have found most valuable. On this particular thread, some of the posts from others here have contained so much wisdom that it can take months for me to extract it all. I am still finding certain quotes from other members reappearing in my mind long after anything was said, and finding new meaning, or maybe the originally intended meaning for the first time.
And possibly the biggest thing that sets futures.io (formerly BMT) apart is, the posts by others seem so "real", and regardless of the difficult issue, be it divorce or trading (which is the more painful at times?), it is comforting just to have someone to discuss it with. Whether that is someone who can offer advice on how to move forward, or just to say, "I know, I feel that way too", futures.io (formerly BMT) offers this space as a virtually unlimited resource. And so full of quality insight.
Another great thing about futures.io (formerly BMT) is I never know who is going to say what that will trigger some other thought. The last post about a new life opened a new door this morning. A new definition, really.
Metamorphosis - “a profound change in form from one stage to the next in the life history of an organism”, says dictionary.com.
In the case of tadpole to frog, the change is gradual, analogous, possibly, to how we shift slowly over time. In contrast, the transformation from caterpillar to butterfly, such vast change in such a relatively short period of time, seems to be extreme enough to be determined by nature to require hiding the details, in the form of a cocoon.
Change can be beautiful, but the process can be ugly.
Wikipedia goes on to add that metamorphosis is “usually accompanied by a change of habitat or behavior”. I would agree, and add in my case, a change of beliefs, incentive, priorities and understanding.
This thread has chronicled both the beautiful and the ugly of my own metamorphosis. Possibly this thread is my cocoon. And what has caused me to define it that way recently, is that I feel I am emerging. Possibly that is the feeling of detachment from futures.io (formerly BMT) I felt one night this past week?
I have always been a go-getter, goal-setter, unstoppable bundle of tenacity. That is great, for a lot of things. Maybe even for learning to trade it is required.
But for the act of trading, the ability to let go of any specific goal, or specific outcome, or any sort of guarantee of anything... and just, be... just allow something else to be in charge... The mental reconfiguration required is no less amazing than any other process of transformation.
(possible, but never really known in hindsight).